Self Development
Traditional Learner vs. Online Instruction
I have been taking an online course over the last 3 weeks; actually 3 different classes. I have always been a Traditional student. That is a student who attends in class style learning. One received a syllabus, got their books, and began reading assignments. Each scheduled class calls a student to appear ready and willing to learn. Some group participation was required and that was fine. Help was readily available. I’d meet fellow students for a cup of coffee or we’d compare where we were at in our journey. I loved learning this way, because it taught me to be present, alert, and sociable.
I have taken a few webinars in the past few years, but not with any real interaction. I was talked “at”. I must say I am now on a learning curve with on line learning, and the experience has been wonderful so far. I like the webinars each week and being able to ask questions or confirm answers to the teacher.
I’ve appreciated the list of learning assignments coming each week. It isn’t as overwhelming now that I see the process better. I still feel concerned that once the course is over, I won’t know where to turn.
With the Podcasting program, I can reach back and pay for additional consulting support. I recognize I am on a learning curve and will need assistance on occasion. My hope is that it will allow me to really reach out and be available to helping others. Hopefully I will connect with some techie people nearby.
With the Guitar Class it is a fun thing, but demands practice. Small steps of what and how to practice has helped. This has been meeting twice a week and with patients, I have had to see replays due to the time it is offered.
With the Achievement Accelerator it is listening. Writing out worksheets and coordinating with my schedule help me to go forward. Many things I know already, but having them in a new format is really helpful.
In all of these classes my underlying motivation is to keep intellectually sharp and keep learning. It is sort of like Duolingo. Anybody out there try it? It is learning a language on line. I have been doing it for over a year and a half, everyday! It isn’t stressful and it’s a fun thing I do in the evening. I wouldn’t otherwise be taking a language class in person. At least I am learning vocabulary and basic words.
I guess this is where scheduling oneself is a priority. It is a necessary tool to keeping up with everything. That isn’t too bad, except that I am more focused than ever to get everything done well. Trying to stay in the moment.
These three instructors have been supportive. Last week Cliff Ravenscraft walked me through a few areas that would have made things very difficult. That was a mini miracle having support. I think some of the FEAR from tackling technical issues is leaving me.
Today the Guitar Instructor from Dublin called me. It was good to personally connect about the techniques of the class. How cool is that?
The biggest advantage is being able to review and watch videos and instructions over and over if needed. I realized that having mentors for a these short 4 week classes pushed me to keep on task. In my own defense though, I seldom procrastinate about homework or tackling things. I will proceed forward with caution, but enthusiasm.
I think this angel sitting on this stack of books has been spending extra hours with me sitting on top of the computer. LOL
I hope she stays near, because I have lots more to learn, practice, and review. Indeed there have been mini miracles along this pathway. Already some of my patients have benefited from what I am learning. That is so cool.
But the bottom line is that I was graced with a good experiences thanks to Cliff Ravenscraft, Marko Gazic, and Brendon Burchard. I will continue to forge on each week. Hopefully I can pass along, as much as I can, to help others. Only one drawback; now I need to move more! Stay tuned and Delight in Living!
What is Renewing for You?
What is Renewing for You?
Three movies that I found uplifting were: It’s a Wonderful Life with James Stewart, Sister Act with Whoopi Goldberg, and Mamma Mia with Meryl Streep. I have repeatedly watched all three movies, because they were uplifting and fun. I love musicals and good endings so the last two fit both standards easily. Heavy duty movies with adventure and mystery are often too realistic and downers for me. At this point in life, I want uplifting and renewing entertainment.
Learning new things is great fun and renew me. I enjoy taking classes and going to group events where I am stimulated mentally. With the craze of “on line” learning opportunities” I am jumping on board. Certainly different for those of us who have learned everything in person attending countless classes over the years. I must say they are fun, but I miss developing personal connections with my classmates. Most of them, I will never meet or see in person. It’s sad and the biggest drawback to on line learning.
Several of my friends are long distance bicycle riders; others are into tennis and running marathons. Again these physical endeavors are providing renewal for them. Workout gyms, YMCA’s, sports centers, and health sites are popping up all over. Summer sports draw us out to connect with one another and develop new interests like traveling or music.
I wish my parents had the money to give me piano lessons. The closest I came to learning it as a child was to a short class using a cardboard keyboard. No sound coming from the piano didn’t help and after memorizing the keys, the thrill was over. I have always continued loving the sound of piano music.
As an adult raising children and being a full time mom put the lessons on the side burner for years, but now I will attempt playing whenever I want a sense of freedom or relaxation. Music can be exhilarating to say the least. I am now trying to learn a guitar. It is slow going and my fingers are not sure how to maneuver the frets.
What is renewing for you? Is it reading a good book or traveling the world over? Is it a daily workout with friends? Is it learning something new and different? Is it doing something easy like watching a movie? Do you like to play an instrument and use it as a “go to” for relaxation? Are you happy to play with the grandkids or coach a team?
Enjoy the season; find joy in the small things. “Delight in Living”
Are You On Vacation?
Are You On Vacation?
Where am I going? I once missed an event that I really wanted to attend, because I was scared of getting lost in the country at night. It was a rural area, cold, and unknown to me. No GPS existed back then. We didn’t have cell phones to carry with us. As a result of my insecurities, I did not attend. I decided it would be the last time that I’d miss something, because of feeling unsure of myself. It was a very conscious decision to change how I thought about things.
Well we all get lost. We miss an exit. We get somewhere too late. We miss the main thrust of the program or speaker we wanted to hear.
This leads me to the question, “Are you on vacation”? Are you missing the fun in life, because you aren’t present? Vacations don’t mean that you have to leave town or that you can’t get away. Mentally, we can all escape and take a break from day-to-day obligations and commitments. And that is what I want to suggest to you today.
Last night was a special night. A priest from our local parish retired a few years back but we hosted and all looked forward to celebrating his Golden Jubilee of Priesthood with us. The church was packed with people from around the country. Well known and loved for his outstanding commitment to empower people was evident. People were smiling and patient with one another.
The feeling was relaxed, but so joyful when I pulled into the parking lot. Inside there was a buzz of laughter, conversations, and people dressed up for the event. The service was long, but I didn’t realize it until much later. The music was superb with a few solo performances before and during the Mass. Many deacons and several Priests were in attendance. The church was so happy and I wished everyone in my family was there to share it with me.
Last night was a “vacation” for me. I felt totally outside the usual obligations that I have 24/7. I shut business out of my mind. I turned off the fears and concerns that plague me in caring for a loved one, knowing there was nothing I could do now anyway. I had not planned the evening in this way. Although I had looked forward to it, I had not expected the free feeling I received.
The evening ended in a downpour of rain with a lit up sky! It was like a big exclamation point of cleansing. The intense shower cooled down the day. No longer did it seem muggy and humid. The ride home felt so refreshing. I replayed some of the humor and laughter from the talks as I drove.
These mini vacations from seemingly minor moments are very refreshing. They just happen and when they do, I embrace them fully. Look back at your week. What were the mini miracles that popped up from a minor moment. Was it when someone did a favor for you? Was it when the phone rang and a piece of news delighted you? Was it the unexpected piece of mail that made things easier? I shall share that with you in a future blog! Meantime, Delight in Living.
Pump Yourself Up!
Pump Yourself Up!
What pumps you up? I find hanging around younger people is becoming my passion more and more. It always was part of my game plan that God provided, but in the last year I am more driven than ever before. I enjoy their love for music, for learning, and for the virtual world. I like their spontaneity and enthusiasm. Now why this is a surprise I don’t know. I am a teacher and have been in some capacity since the 1970’s.
I love teenagers. They may make crazy decisions and poor life choices, but they are beginning to refine who they are and where they are going. They are looking at occupations, trying to find sources of money, get educations, and travel. It isn’t all bad when things get sifted out, golden nuggets appear. It is in our mistakes we forge ahead.
So here is a photo of a “sea of graduates”. These students are among many from countless high schools, universities, and specialty schools all who are closing one chapter of life and entering into a new one. Some will soar with the Eagles faster than others; some will end up swimming. Some of these students were very successful during High School; others just wanted to get through and on to the next stage.
I’d like to mentor for all of them. They are important in my life. This site, blogging and soon podcasting will help me to do that. It will allow me the chance to give some wisdom and get some energy back. Your insights and thoughts will also be good for all of us, so as we progress in the weeks ahead, please help share the best and most positive ideas. From them we can all grow.
The backlash of helping others is that we 
become fueled and inspired to do more; to give more. Learning something that provides an “ah ha” moment is awesome for all of us. Those moments keep popping up all around us. These “mini miracles” are the happening for you too. They happen when you least expect them!
I was blessed today by a friend who helped me learn something new. I hope what I learned will multiply with time and something that I can pass on to others along the journey.
“We do our best and the Lord does the rest!” It is a good mantra because it puts some responsibility on each of us to be responsible. “Delight in Living” and have a safe and healthy holiday weekend.
Creating the Life You Want!
Creating the Life You Want!
Are you intentional about creating the life you want? Are you doing the things you enjoy most? If not, why? What is holding you back? Is it a fear of some sort, or is the timing all wrong?
Most of us take time to clean out closets, pass on clothes that don’t fit, and share objects no longer needed. We wash the floors and throw out bent or broken hangers. We note what needs mending and get things repaired. These are all functional things that we do regularly.
We all have a traveling trunk. It is an invisible tool chest that we’ve been packing since childhood. It is filled with feelings, thoughts, audio and visual replays from our parents. We also have a file of skills. Skills like reading, writing, and reasoning. It has a section for dealing with friendships and interacting with one another. There are hidden emotions and memories that have accumulated; some of which we’d like to toss.
Do you know how these got packed into your traveling trunk? Were they thrown in haphazardly or with care from well intended caregivers? Did you teachers help you develop attitudes of hope and cheerfulness? Were you taught to be generous and grateful? Did others leave you feeling angry and mentally bruised? Were you school years or athletic endeavors favorable?
This chest may not be invisible, but you can see the potential in it to hang on to things you don’t need. That is true mentally, as well. Clean it out and like yourself more.
Now the question becomes “Are you taking time as an adult to repack and get parenting updates for yourself?” Are you tossing out bad memories and repacking good ones? Are you empowering yourself? If not, I have just commissioned you to take charge.
I encourage you to do so today. Pick your friends. Listen to good Podcasts. Watch worthwhile movies. Travel around your country and other places to understand how cultures affect you. Learn new languages. Listen to new music. Meet new people and develop hobbies.
This is time to erase bad memories. Maybe a counselor can help you put aside thinking that is no longer used or needed. It is good to express yourself and hear you hear yourself saying what is on your mind. Embrace a spirit of thankfulness. Take responsibility for putting a smile on your face and in your heart.
“Delight in Living” begins right now!
What Depression?
What Depression?
Yesterday I was going through my normal day, when I heard the broadcasters discussing Paul McCartney. Recently he has opened up about his depression following the break up of the Beatles in 1970. Now that he is in his early 70’s, he was reflecting on this strained time. It was a difficult period of time for him; his wife Linda helped to bring him forward and refocus.
He had been with the Beatles for a long time and suddenly the loss of these close friends was unbearable. He related it too army buddies who are supportive and connected to one another during their time of service. After their release back into society, things are not as they left. People around them have to readjust too. It is difficult to separate from the security of friends and explain that to those back home who waited. One must acclimate and readjust.
When times of transition happen in our lives, there appear many unknowns. What will I do now? I am so lonesome, who will fill the void? Who will support me emotionally and in my career? How do I begin again? Sadness takes hold of us. Time is needed to process and yet being alone isn’t good. We need people around us to reflect reality for us. It is time to mourn and yet dance to new music.
The good thing about Paul sharing this is that so many people are depressed and keep it inside. It would have been good if had shared this earlier. It may have helped other people. Entertainers, public figures, and professionals are people, too. They hurt so much and aren’t always able to share. They become the headline of the day upon their self imposed death.
It takes courage to be open and to share knowing it could affect their professional success. Often they feel they are the only people that are lonely or despondent! They don’t know what or how to respond to circumstances.
Drinking, drugs, and bad habits like overeating or dormancy can take over. These conditions make things worse. One loses perspective. Minds get cloudy and confused and behaviors tend to bring everyone around us down too.
All of us have emotions. We have feelings and times of loneliness. If you are on a natural high and tend to be joy filled, by all means reach out to those who aren’t. Good feelings can be contagious too. So here are a few thoughts:
1-As counselors, coaches and professionals, we are here to serve and help.
2-Take one day at a time.
3-Place yourself among happy, healthy and vibrant people.
4-Physically get up and start with a simple walk.
5- Go places to be with other people. Laugh and play as children do. They make things fun.
This child was at a Department Store imitating store models. Fun was spontaneous. We all need to enjoy “the moment” at hand!
6-Eat well, but in moderation.
7- Listen to music, take up a hobby, learn a new skill–Just do it!
8- All things are temporary and better times will come around. Hang on, stay productive in some way.
9-Volunteer your services and time. It helps to value yourself and keep you purposeful.
Good news is just around the corner, “Delight in Living”! Mini Miracles are present in Minor Moments!
Keeping On Task
Keeping On Task
Sometimes my calendar is just loaded with appointments, commitments, and meetings. I sit and evaluate each evening as I set my plan of attack for the next day. I like to be busy and productive. Plus I enjoy people and want to reach out to them; one doesn’t do that by hiding away.
This weekend one of my grandchildren graduates from High School. I am so thrilled for her, because she is at the threshold of beginning life. So many opportunities are available to her and everyone reading this blog. Beyond classes, there is a world of traveling, cultural avenues, and musical opportunities.
This is a cartoon of Petey. He was a fast runner and a loyal friend. His antics were usually funny. He had a soccer ball with a small torn flap. He’d play keep away. He was also a good partner if you wanted to practice soccer moves!
I have decided I am a perpetual learner. There are ongoing educational possibilities for learning. These include learning social skills, in-person workshops, and community theaters for good cultural presentations. Today I started working online with two personal and professional coaches. New approaches help me and those I counsel daily. I want to have a good referral system in place for my patients and friends.
Just a recommendation:
If getting organized is needed, you might check out www.jonathanmilligan.com or to feel more energized bryanpaulbuckley.com
I registered for an intense Podcasting course that begins next week. I have already received and began tackling the first assignments. I know many of the younger people are aware of how to do it all, but I want to learn the technical and application options well. It will add to this Blog site and make it available for those “on the run” who don’t have time to read everything.
So I ask you, What do you want to learn? Have you thought about what is holding you back from taking up an instrument or getting a certificate in something new?
Are you always rushing around, but getting nowhere?
Who is a good mentor for you?
Are your needs personal, professional, or relationship based?
Whatever your day brings, remember to stay focused, prayer filled and “Delight in Living”! Mini Miracles are oozing out of Minor Moments each and every day!
Gratitude 101
Gratitude 101
My mother-in-law was always very thankful even though she had plenty. Her favorite line was “thanks loads” and she was sincere. She was also good at writing notes of appreciation. She died at 94, but seemed to lead a full and vibrant life. I think her attitude helped greatly.
Being grateful goes a long way in shaping ones’ attitude. It helps us put things into perspective. We are not as inclined to compare or judge other people when we focus on all that we already have obtained. We are aware of all the good things that happen in life.
It is easy to take things for granted. Most of us are fortunate to have shelter and a bed to sleep in each night. When I see people jobless and struggling to live one month or day at a time, it is hard to comprehend. Our local church is having a “Sleep Out for Shelter Fundraiser” this coming weekend. I suspect the parking lots will be loaded as it was last year too. That tells me that many people are concerned for their neighbors and the less fortunate.
We don’t have to give or receive presents to “feel grateful” although We don’t have to give or receive presents to “feel grateful” although it is nice to receive even the smallest token of appreciation! It “feels good” to give, as well.
We take our spouses and children for granted also. We just assume they will be there to take up what needs to be done. Be appreciative and offer thanks for their efforts. It goes a long way in setting an example for others, your offsprings, and in keeping us close to one another.
A “spirit” of gratitude is contagious. We hear others say “thank you” and it reminds us to also acknowledge the goodness of people. I find it takes so little to tell someone that they are appreciated when they do something well for you. I just had some cabinet changes made in my office. The carpenter went out of his way to make things perfect. I hope my appreciation was shining through.
I’ve noticed adults telling their kids to say “please” and “thank you”, but as adults we forget to use these words. We don’t have to give or receive presents to “feel grateful” although it is nice to receive even the smallest token of appreciation!
It “feels good” to give, but givers need to accept gifts of time, talent, and material things, as well. We had a neighbor who’s dog ran away and I found it. He was so grateful that he gave us a basket of fresh large juicy strawberries in thanksgiving. Over the years whenever we did the slightest thing, he’d respond with a gift of appreciation. When it came to repaying him for favors though, he wouldn’t take anything. It was difficult for us to reciprocate.
Some blessings are not apparent to us as they are happening. These hidden facts are revealed after the fact and when it is seemingly impossible to give thanks. It is then we must forward the gifts we have been given to others. We must continue the chain of giving.
Good attitudes and gracious people help to make the world go around. Let’s all try to participate.
“Thanks to everyone who helps me, I do appreciate you!”
Being observant of even a smile teaches us all to “Delight in Living”!
8 Tried and True Life Lessons to be Shared!
8 Tried and True Life Lessons to be Shared!
1- Don’t recreate the wheel. Ask others the way to go. Experience is a great teacher, but we can learn vicariously as well.
2- Finish what you start. Last night’s newscast featured a man in his 80’s who received a Bachelor’s Degree. He graduated with Summa Cum Laude and was signing up for another class. What a great example of completion to a goal he set after retirement. We grow and put closure on things allowing a new door to open widely.
3- When buying anything, do a little research. It will save you money, time returning things, and give you peace of mind. I have a rocker that is 40 years old and continues to serve us well. A little time in finding it has paid off royally.
4- It is easier to prevent something than cure it. It is raining out. So much better to have those windshield wipers fresh and working.
5- An apple a day keeps the doctor away. In essence, it is good to eat the right foods to stay healthy and feel our best. It is prudent to find what works for you!
6- Dress for the day. It might serve you well to have an umbrella, sunhat, blanket, and a hooded jacket in the car. Often Chicago weather changes and its a benefit to keep ahead of the game. In the winter, a safety kit with flashlights, protein bars, and salt might be worthwhile. We’ve all been caught in the wind, rain, and cold.
7- New isn’t always necessary. In others words, if something is working well, don’t replace it. A man gave me that advice regarding a hot water heater. It had a long life and served us well many years after he told me that! Thank you!
8- When there is a warning sign, take it seriously. This includes weather warnings and health signs. Two such thoughts come to mind. Many people owe their life to listening to the warning of tornado sirens and taking prudent steps to save themselves. Just this week, we had several growths removed from our dog and one was a “Mast Cell” caught early. It was only the size of a tiny spot, but seemed bothersome to her. Thank goodness we had it removed.
Hope these tips help make good choices for you. May your day be blessed. “Delight in Living!”
Transitions
I grew up in a world of ink, typewriters, and carbon paper. I didn’t realize I was from the dark ages until one of my interns asked me “what is carbon paper?” Carbon paper is what you didn’t want to be using if you made a mistake! It was messy, smeared all over one’s hands and was impossible to neatly erase. It was used whenever one needed a copy. It was the forerunner of carbonless copies and thermal paper. It served its purpose, but I am so happy it is not in my office!
Today I went to use an eraser; it is my friend. I love erasers, because it frees one to make an error and remove it. Yet I remember in school, when we were told we needed to do everything in ink. Although using a pen elevated us to a more adult level, I think that is when I feared putting anything onto paper. It created an unspoken anxiety about writing anything down. Even though making mistakes is part of the growth process, but no one told me that.
Then I entered the world of typing. One of my first jobs was working in a law office where we needed copies for just about everything. We didn’t have correction ribbon at the time, nor the white out we all can use these days. There were no self correcting ribbons! I learned to focus on what I was doing so I didn’t have to retype letters or documents.
When I taught, the ditto masters that were used had purple dye for creating a master copy. Mistakes were removed by scratching off the purple letters with a razor blade. What a hassle! Plus the smell and purple finger tips did not lend to looking professional.
Now we live in the world of computers! Computers are wonderful. We can write a whole paragraph or create a design and voila, simple hit the delete key if anything was put down in error. Remarkable, neat, and simple.
But what about our lives? When we make a mistake, what happens? It isn’t easy to hit delete and start over. There are consequences of marrying too young. Pain in one’s body due to a bad car accident in our early driving times may plague us forever. Falling into a bankrupt state due to using credit cards may keep us from the dreams of owning property. Job losses may result in marital breakups. Raising children all with different IQ’s, emotional states, and behavioral issues can be difficult. Help!
Holding hands and walking with people through difficult times is my job. We all need support especially during transitional times. Times of failing health, broken marriages, and grieving for loved ones may come when we least expect them. There are moments of confusion and tension that seem to overwhelm us.
We need to learn to share our thoughts and feelings and also express them. For many people, being strong equals being silent and swallowing the pain. It doesn’t work well and eventually comes out in our behaviors. Counseling is a privilege. It was once only for the rich and famous, but now is available for everyone. It is good for resolving issues.
Hopefully your day is a good one today. Whether it is erasing a difficult time of transitioning into a better time, “Delight in Living” along with me.