Self Development
A Fight with a Mailbox
The silliest things get me crazy and this was my most recent struggle. I came home Saturday night and stopped at our mail box. Inside was a box surrounded by a stack of letters tucked on the side. It was a delivery of pens for my office that I had sent home. Innocent enough.
I grabbed the edge of the stack of mail and pulled it out. When I went to grab the box I couldn’t get a hold of it to pull it out. The box actually started to slide to the side. I tried to tug it in and as you see it was folding. That didn’t get me anywhere.
I stepped out of the car thinking I could get more leverage and noticed ice under foot. I was trying to avoid the ice and balance myself enough to pull out the box. Tried to open a flap to have a handle of sorts and instead broke a fingernail. Not a good idea!
Now I am frozen and aware of a car approaching. We live on a corner and my concern was getting hit. The car ended up turning. Sigh. We have no street lights so the only light was from my inside car light. I took the picture, because at this point I thought about sharing my frustration in writing.
So I get back into the car and grab some keys. My intention was to start to put a hol
e in the box so I could pull it out. I did and finally ended up with this mess. The box contents were fine, but I was very annoyed.
This isn’t the first time this has happened. Our usual postman brings things to our door so I rather think this was a substitute delivery person. But this like so many oddities can be most annoying and time consuming. Thank goodness the pens were wrapped in two plastic bags and not loose in the box!
Now in the house with my hands full, I start up to the kitchen. In the kitchen, I dropped one of the bags and out popped a salad I had just bought. You guessed it! The lid went flying and lettuce, chicken, and salad contents were all over the place. No photo here of that scene because it was not a pretty sight!
Side bar here just to tell you that I had one dog who looked at me for permission to help. I removed the pieces of chicken for her. At least one of us benefited from the situation. Unfortunately, I was left with washing the kitchen floor! So I guess that is one chore done that wasn’t in my plan for a Saturday night.
What are some of the things that get you crazy? At least things that distracting like this? Is it locking your keys in the car? Is it losing a letter only to find it between the car seats? (That happened to me earlier this week after I went on line for the information.) Is it when you are all dressed up and something drops on you?
Please let me know your latest frustration and if it is okay to use in a future blog. In the meantime, look for the highlights and mini miracles. I thought afterwards how blessed I was that these things were so minor. No accidents, no falls, and no damaged products! Just content for my blog, laughing out loud!
TODAY
Getting up each morning to face the day is a real delight. There are so many circumstances that people face that are overwhelming. Just being grateful for the daily routine is beautiful. Opportunities abound when we are open to them. Today the sunshine is a welcome to the day. The skies are clear and the air brisk for a January day. Being in the northern suburbs of Illinois, I tell you this is wonderful!
There is an old adage that we are to think before we speak. Well that is so true. It is better to think things through and reflect on what our words say. Even far truer is that we are to think about the behaviors people take when we speak to them. It is easy to react to what someone says. We may go into a defense mode when we don’t need to do so. And likewise we need to not put others on defense. Everyone is responsible for their own actions. We are meant to work together as a team for our communities, our families, and our country.
Teenagers and young people however, need direction and guidance. They need to know how their actions and behaviors affect other people. Recently I watched a younger person stop and do a u-turn on a small street near a few stores. Obviously, they did not consider the danger it put others in. I stopped and watched in amazement how they just assumed everyone else was to stop and watch out for them. Now some of the best drivers are the young ones who are following the rules and being conscientious of other people. I applaud them.
Selfishness seems rampant these days! What is that all about? I have noticed that often during these past holidays. It is as if everyone has become self-centered. Now is the time to look at ourselves. I have been trying to be aware of how my schedule affects other people. I am trying to be thoughtful and I invite you to join me in this conscious behavior. We need to think before we act or speak unkindly.
Look for the Mini Miracles and gracious people. Thank them and help them to continue being that way. Have a great day and a beautiful Wednesday.
Why Fight It?
As a sophomore in high school, we had gym classes every day. I recall having a horrible cold and feeling awful. The teacher had tough guidelines. I had to play volleyball in spite of feeling lethargic. By the end of the class, I felt excellent. My nose was not running; my energy was great.
That experience was the first time I recognized the power of moving. It happened so long ago, but I still remember the feeling. I try to remind myself to just start moving whenever it is I feel poorly. 
Exercising your body can bolster mental health. It helps us clarify our thoughts. It’s like a booster shot that works almost instantly. It is the feeling of exhilaration one gets after accomplishing something new. A good workout transforms a person. The tiredness goes away. The achy muscles seem to ease and the head just clears up!
The benefits are so good. Even if one just takes a walk, it is uplifting. Sleeping improves, stress is relieved, and the desire to workout more often becomes addictive. Runners say they get a high.
If the benefits are so good, why do we push away from exercising? Is it because we have to change clothes? Is it too much too get in the car and go to the gym? Is it that it isn’t seen as a priority? So why is it we fight establishing a habit? I used to do water programs, but the water and chemicals made me itchy and it was hard to make classes. Working out takes time away from my work? It is hard to do consistently when one is a caretaker. I remember for 2, plan for 2, watch out for 2, and for 24/7, I am on alert for 2. It is all the more reason to stay fit and give myself the gift of moving.
So throwing all the excuses out the window are necessary. Let’s help one another be successful. Take an interest in someone you like. Call them. Write them a note. ENCOURAGE ONE ANOTHER. WALK WITH ONE ANOTHER.
What do you do to conquer these issues? Perhaps you don’t have these issues. Or you somehow resolved them. Send ideas to me so I can share them with others via this blog and in coaching. We need to learn along the way for ourselves and for one another.
I asked myself the question a few months ago of “why don’t I stay consistent with working out?” I keep coming back to the same answers. I hate getting sweated up. It takes planning to drag extra clothes with me. I need to look halfway decent and never do after working out. And how do I take time out of the day to do it? I joined a club and still didn’t do it after a long day.
So I am back to a version of what did work.
First, I realized I was best at not being demanding on myself. I actually told myself that just 10 minutes on the treadmill was easy. It always expands into more time, when I have the television on in front of me. It is just starting that is the hardest for me. Just show up. Although I hope to get down there more often, I have it in my calendar for every other day. Kudos if I do more.
Secondly, I also like to see cumulative progress. I worked on Duolingo for over 240 days, then started again. Then for 555 days until I missed one day and lost the status. That was so frustrating that I lost interest. I think I will get back into another program to keep myself from losing the progress I made up until last week. It just was such an insight for me that I need to visualize and SEE progress.
Losing weight and firming up seem to take such a long time, that at least seeing something on paper helps for the short term. So I have the new 2017 Calendar posted nearby my equipment to list the smallest attempt. It propels me to do more and more.
3rdly, the treadmill, light weight bike, and new rowing machine are lined up with bouncing board in our basement. It is warm down there, easy to get to, and I don’t have to look good for anyone except Rosy. She seems to have found a comfy rug next to the bike to recline on and keep me company.
So with all that figured out, I have a plan to do something in addition to using my Fitbit. That little helper has encouraged me to walk! Now, it is another number on my workout calendar each day.
So friends, let’s do this. Get up and go. Walk the length of a store, walk from your car, take out the dog, or find something you can do each day. It is 2017 and we are all going to be Healthier! Let the Mini Miracles of being consistent work for us. Embrace change!
Where is it?
On more than one occasion, I have misplaced a slip of paper, a note, or something of importance. “I just had that!” It happens less than it used to because I am more aware of losing stuff. What usually happens is that I pick up a pile of papers or bills and it is at the bottom of the pile. Then I began to think that often when we misplace things in our minds it is often the same. For the moment it is not of importance and we lay it aside to do the most urgent thing.
So I ask you, does this happen to you? What have you “lost” for the moment? Have you tucked it away? I recall after my mother-in-law died, that we looked all over for her telephone. Our son had bought her a cell phone so that we could reach her or so that she had an emergency phone with her. Often she did not turn it on. Once we found it tucked in the kitchen cabinet and she said that she took it with when she needed it. So of course after she died it was the first place we looked and it wasn’t to be found.
Later it was discovered safely tucked away in the Safety Deposit Box. I understand completely that she treasured it enough to save it.
Do you want to learn more? Are you content with what you know and just move along? Are you in a place where you don’t think it is necessary? Everyone makes their own decisions in that regard, but I don’t want anyone left behind who wants to learn more. I guess as a counselor and coach I am always trying to empower people to feel the best they can about themselves.
As we get older, some things appear to be just too much to grasp. And that is what I am addressing today. It is a “PEP TALK” for all of us. Please don’t get frustrated when you misplace something. Just keep looking until it reappears. If something appears too hard to do, try to find a way to learn about it.
There are already so many things you have learned and one more thing isn’t too much. In fact, the more we learn the better we feel equipped to handle other things. It is a domino effect of sorts of empowering yourself. As we enter into another year, see it as an opportunity for growth. A New Year = new opportunities for loving and learning about yourself and others.
Find the mini miracles around you today. They are waiting to be discovered and to be found. Maybe in a safety deposit box or your cabinet. But they are there as a means of safety and a propeller for new information.
Sacks, Bags, & Luggage?
Where are you going? I see a closet filled with sacks, bags, and luggage. Where did they come from? Let’s see? Some were given to me. There are a few new ones I received as gifts. There are some with a history of numerous trips. I have a bunch in my car that are cloth for groceries. In the pantry are plastic ones from miscellaneous purchases to use for garbage cans. The spare closet has luggage, big purses, and bags for the gym. I keep giving them away and they multiply. 
Here’s a disclaimer: I do love purses and containers of all sizes for they do help us carry the important things with us.
We all have containers. Right? Where have yours come from? What do you intend to go? Have you recently bought anything? How many have come to you during this Christmas season?
Well, let me switch to emotional baggage now. Where has yours come from? Broken marriages, illnesses, joyful times, memories of a great childhood? I think baggage is useful! It all serves to teach us and to help us see who we are becoming. I like the prettier bags with times of happiness and good news, but I am not naive to think they are all so pretty.
Like baggage that has taken you on trips, it is scraped up and dirty. It serves one well and gets us to and from our destinations. It can even make us thankful. Some of it breaks apart and the contents spills. I recall a trip on a cruise many years ago. Our luggage was new and broke between the ship and flight to California. We had it temporarily repaired, but it had to be discarded. In the process, we tried to desperately save the contents. We also bought straps that helped keep it together. Then and ever since I recognize that security straps are essential.
Ever been there? Saving the contents, that is? Trying to claim the best of the best and hang on to the rest somehow? Now is the time to discard the old negative feelings, heal, forgive, and pack in new hope and joy for the next year. Pray, focus, work on relationships. Scrap the old and bind up what you have that can be enhanced.
Look for the Mini Miracles and smile. Travel well, pack carefully, and plan ahead.
Post Christmas Meltdown
How do you feel the day after a Holiday? Are you in a good place? Is it a letdown feeling? Is it quiet at your house? Are you napping? Watching TV? Are there teenagers or college kids home? Are you expecting more company or a late celebration?
It happens every year to me and you’d think I’d be aware, but like a monster from the dark, it bounces out. I love the Christmas theme of Jesus’ Birthday and the essence of HOPE. I love the gathering of family and sharing a dinner together. I enjoy the beauty and fullness of the church each year! I enjoy the grandchildren, their excitement, and all the delicious traditions!
Come the following day, and I am wiped out. Yes, I said wiped out.
Wiped out of energy! I put so much time into planning the different facets of the Holiday. I focus on Advent, the preparation of the Feast, the responsibility to be inclusive and giving. It is an odd feeling that overcomes me. Maybe it is all the extra physical and emotional energy that is spent over the days and hours until our family gathers.
This year I had extra help with the food preparation and with the physical work of moving furniture and tables. I am so grateful for it. As in the past, I am prayerful and attentive to those who going through medical and health issues. I have experienced the highs and lows of the Holidays for many years, so I have empathy. I am grateful for the thoughtful gifts given to me. And for the chance to unwind today. Sigh.
Maybe it is the sudden quiet after the loud noise of the season with all its commercialism. Did you I notice weeks of sales magazines flooding into your mailbox and requests for money?
Did the extreme colds and then the flurries of snow seem oddly draining? The weather did drain me. Out came all the scarves and gloves. And then today, it is oddly warm, sunny, and a mess from a heavy rain in the last 24 hours. The sun is so welcome and feels so warm and revitalizing, as long as, one is inside.
Before our company arrived, I sat down for a 5 min. texting break with my diet coke.
I actually did lots of cleanup outside and to our basement storage area this morning. I got up earlier than expected due to an excess of achy muscles and a sore back. The last few days of moving furniture and additional demands was a bit much.
Thanks to my husband’s cousin who stayed and helped with the final cleanup, much of the house was put back in order last night. I ran round with a hand vacuum and a broom this morning. This afternoon is “FREE” and unscheduled, except for a load of table napkins and kitchen towels.
Now I am just taking it all in. I love all the thoughtful gifts and well wishes. Rereading the cards, looking at a pile of new books to consume over the next 6 months. I had 8 non fiction next to my chair and a devotional book. Just added another 5 to the pile; 2 of them are fictional, and another devotional. They all look so inviting that I will have evenings filled.
So may you receive many Blessings as we go forward. I know we move on into the New Year with high expectations and opportunities. It is good to be positive, acknowledge your post holiday monsters and move them aside. Thanks to all the readers—mini miracles are yet to appear!
New Year Wishes
Hello Friends! Well this year has been an exciting one for me. In the process of learning to Podcast, I have fallen into the world of Technology. There is so much to learn and I have suddenly found myself craving to learn more. I just spent a few hours learning a few new apps and a new program for holding music in my I-Pad. I think how much easier it would be for someone to just show me in 
person, but slowly through the power of U-Tube and Webinars, it comes my way.
So what is your wish for the New Year? Somethings we can make happen; other things I believe are by the grace of God. My wish would be to spend a day in the midst of a Cliff Ravenscraft or like-minded guru. I may just have to add that to my list of goals for 2017. Meantime, I try to take in as much as possible via recordings.
I have a stack of book here and another at my office to read. I read a chapter here and there to take myself to a new level. I am also creating a Master Mind Group in 2017. Hope to have that up and running really soon. If you feel you’d like to be part of a structured, but highly motivating group that is meant to help one another, contact me. It is a commitment to excellence and attending.
Tell me what are you interested in learning? Do you enjoy reading? Are you into traveling? I’d really like to know so I can give you Free PDF’s and information to help as the year unfolds.
Enjoy your week as Christmas is just about here. “Delight in Living” is more than words, it is a total mindset in grasping the best in life.
Watch for those Mini Miracles. Our Podcasts resume after the New Year begins! Stay tuned for great guests.
Living in a World of Distractions!
Oh boy, we seem to be living in a World of Distractions. Everyone knows it and those who are achievers are constantly trying to keep focused. So today I have decided on helping you filter some of them out. None of us are exempt from the phone calls, interruptions, and getting caught up.
First of all, I must say that some people are better at staying focused than others. It takes effort, practice, and a few tools. Perhaps we are creating a whole new generation of attention deficit individuals. Too much to do and so hard to direct our attention to just one thing. Here are a few clues that might help.
- Do only one thing at a time. Prioritize and schedule! If you are working on washing the dishes, do just that one chore. Finish and move on.
- If you are driving, by all means put that cell phone away. I say this because we all get distracted. Put it on the dash, with the phone upside down. Or if you carry a purse or briefcase, put it inside. If you do need to use it, stop in a parking lot or safe place, take care of the issue or call and put it away.
- Disconnect your E-mail for the moment. For me, I make a time to get to it all, clean up the loose ends, and dump the garbage. Once a week, I go through and dump all the Clutter. One of my email address are with Outlook and it filters wonderfully.
- Communicate your needs and time line to others. A service man for my door, called with his situation. It gives me peace to know the schedule and his intentions. Be good to those you work with or for and communicate!
- I just turned off the radio which was distracting me. It is easy to begin listening to the announcer or music and now focusing on the tasks at hand.
- I even turned off the computer sounds, because it signals incoming emails.
- Write down and carry your lists with you to keep focused on running errands. I tend to figure out in my head the pathway to being efficient and list my chores in that order; it helps because distractions pop up even driving. It is easy to be impulsive and then forget one of the places you meant to stop
- Complete the project at hand.
Lastly, discard the unnecessary, delegate if possible, and deliver what you can on a timely basis. The day is yours, make it a pleasant one and “Delight in Living!”
Where’s Waldo? Where’s Rosy
This morning I let Rosy outside in our yard. Now since our 40 year old Blue Spruce trees are gone, I thought it would be easier to see her. How wrong I was! Usually she moves pretty quickly, today was no different. Even in the piles of snow she bounced quickly outside. Then I realized that her “flag” was gone. Yes. Rosy has a black tail with a 4 inch white tip. It is what I watch to track her around bushes, flower gardens, and trees. Today reminded me that all winter is going to be more difficult. She blends in! 
Which takes me to the topic at hand. Have you found yourself in the rush of the season? There is so much more to do. Gifts to buy, people to contact, and the usual chores still exist. Already I am thinking of the out of town company. There will be extra dinners to plan and the house needs to be cleaned well. Our lives blend in to a chaos of non-stop projects. Kinda’ like Rosy blending into the yard of snow. Our time disappears so fast without being able to enjoy it.
This year I put only one smaller Christmas tree. It is tall and thin; it has fewer decorations than normal. The idea of packing and unpacking ornaments and garland just told me “NO” don’t do it. Plus there is the office to keep up as well. I am learning with aging that sometimes less is best. It is better to keep stress at bay.
Today is St. Nicolas Day. It was always a European tradition that we followed in our home. The shoes went out by the door for nuts, candy, and fruit. I wanted the children to learn about the origin of Santa Claus. We traditionally decorate on St. Nicolas Day and take things down after the 3 Kings celebration in January.
We all like to have choices. The simple ones are like picking a color for coloring a picture begin to be made when we are small children. Trying many hobbies, being in many sports, connecting with groups all help us to select more difficult choices later in life. Now as adults there are many choices and goals we need to make as we find our way.
Let’s not get lost in the snow, the rush of the season, and lose our focus. As the year comes to the end, I prepare for the Coaching Packages for Private Clients. Call if you have anything that I can help you with this year. In the meantime, Delight in Living. Enjoy the Mini Miracles that are all around.
Father, forgive them. . .
This morning as I was standing in the shower, the temperature of the water changed and the pressure was less. I realized that my husband was also using the water. Normally, I would have yelled across the house to let him know I was showering, but since I know he couldn’t hear me, I hesitated. Instead a few other thoughts came to mind.
I thought, wow, how selfish I was to think he’d have to be the one to shut the water off. Secondly, I knew it was not an intentional thing. My husband has a heart of gold. He’d go out of his way for me. Plus it was simply a temporary inconvenience for me.
The next thought that flooded my mind was how grateful I was to have a warm home and the ability to shower whenever I wanted. I had heard a man from a poor town in Africa share. He was a grown man when he came to the USA. Someone had invited him to stay with a congregation of priests and study. He had never seen running water and didn’t even know such a luxury existed. He was surprised to learn all one had to do was turn a knob and water would gush out.
I can’t imagine what that would be like after not having water available to him. Even the water he had had to drink was contaminated. He lost a brother to drinking that same water. The difference was that he received one full meal a day from a missionary society that provided lunch at school. It was why he had stayed in school. Namely, he was so hungry that school seemed like the answer.
And then the words of our Lord, while he hung on the Cross rang out in my head. “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” (Luke 23:34)
Now, I am not a Bible scholar. In all honesty, I should be reading and studying scripture more than I do. It was odd that in a few minutes I 
had totally changed my mind and heart about the situation. This was indeed a mini miracle!!! I have been praying for patience and a kinder, gentler attitude.
Often we are always am feeling rushed and do far too much. I hear that from so many people! We have expectations that we place on ourselves and those we love. We get easily annoyed and become horrible to live with on a daily level. I do think the Lord nudged me into thinking through my actions this morning.
Have a great day and “Delight in Living!”