Marriages often look well to the outside world, but may be splintering within the walls of their home. Couples are called to be teams; two people working with one another. Working to encourage, grow, and protect each other. Sometimes it means that one must put aside their own agenda to help or care the spouse. There is no equality when it comes to sickness, aging, job losses, or unexpected problems. Both spouses are affected!
Marriage commitments once meant forever; what has happened? They were not temporary arrangements. People didn’t just live together; they created a covenant with God. Through good or bad circumstances, people forged ahead and tried their best to keep going.
I have noticed in the recent 10+ years that people give themselves excuses to dissolve a marriage or be unfaithful. They spend weekends and evenings apart with other friends to the exclusion of their mate more frequently than they spend time together. They begin taking vacations separately saying it is necessary, because of schedules.
More and more children commute each week back and forth between homes. They have two sets of parents and may have 4 or more sets of grandparents. It becomes confusing for the children even though they have to adapt. Rules are different at each location; sometimes the kids are used as leverage. What’s up with that?
They say people are living longer and they can’t be tied down into a loveless marriage. Instead of focusing on the positive things that are working, they want out. Two people get married for a reason. Something united them whether it was a look, habit, or attitude.
So it is time to reconnect. Find common interests. Look for things that you love in the other person. Start dreaming together about how to resolve problems and create new goals. Lose weight together or walk every evening with one another. Go out for a simple cup of coffee. Talk about things in addition to the children and recall the things you loved about one another. Go to your spouse for company, not friends on Facebook. 
Listen and learn what you can do to make your mate #1. This means making PRIME TIME for each other; even if it is only for 1/2 hour. Take a short walk together either outside or through a mall. Go to church together. It’s an hour of time to hold hands and thank God for one another.
Be grateful for the things you’ve accomplished together. Raising children, paying off bills, wallpapering a room, or simply walking through some past crisis is an accomplishment. You can accomplish more things together. Work as one to resolve financial, housing, and/or personal issues.
It may mean simply cutting back and enjoying what you have, more than spending money. See a counselor, but keep your marriage together. You’ll be glad you did. Envision your life together as happy, unified, and healthy. Don’t run away from disagreements; learn to resolve them.
Finally, if your marriage has already dissolved into a divorce, take the time to reflect on what part you played in the division. We can all change ourselves for the better. Forgive yourself and the other person. Visit a counselor to analyze what really happened so you can avoid future relationship failures. Smile and move forward.
With those thoughts for the day, “Delight in Living”!