This sweet one year old is being kept safe by the banister. At this point in time, she needs boundaries to keep her from falling.
Boundaries Begin & Never End
We all begin as pretty adventuresome children. We try to climb and search things out. We become masters at testing the limits that our guardians set out for us.
Banisters, gates and playpens are meant for safety. They remind us to be careful; to hold onto when we are wobbly. Whether we are just learning to walk or using a cane due to an injury, we rely on boundaries to keep us from danger.
Here these students are being watched by adults. The bus driver has put out his stop gate and cars have been reminded to be careful. Rules are boundaries too.
Recently I was watching a story about the Ice Carvings being made in Lake Geneva. Because it is a popular event, many cars were parked on the icy Lake. Many reportedly fell into the water. The weight of so many may have caused them to be plunged into the water. There were natural boundaries that were broken like the shoreline and temperature in this case.
So why a blog on boundaries? Boundaries are not only physical. They pertain to every aspect of our lives. Yes, we learn to follow rules in team sports. We have dress codes for work and uniforms in some academic settings.
A reminder of an intersection where pedestrians and cars cross is a great boundary reminder.
Rules pertain to getting on and off public transportation. Driving near schools, there are speed limits, traffic guards, and lights to remind drivers of the potential for harm. We have signs to keep us and others safe.
We learn that we need to treat each other well. No bullying is allowed; we are encouraged to feel confident about ourselves and celebrate the successes of one another. In many sports, the teams line up at the end of the game and shake hands.
Who knows what team you’ll be on? What person will become your boss? Who will be your nurse or doctor in the future? Life takes strange turns and being thoughtful, kind, and sensible pays off. Plus boundaries keep people honest and respectful of one another.
Paying your bill at the end of dinner and tipping the person who served you is noted as normal. Also it shows a certain degree of education on the use of proper etiquette. We learn to pay our way in the world and be accountable for what we use and what we share.
At school we are given lockers to keep our coats, books, and property separate. We are directed to keep our hands to ourselves and to do our own work. Doing one’s own homework teaches responsibility and pays off at test time. We share a classroom, but we have our own desks. We are encouraged to keep them clean and neat. We are given time limits to do our work. That carries us right into adulthood as we have jobs and obligations to family, friends, and community.
At grocery stores boundaries are also set. Carts are made available for our use. My dad would instruct us to return them to the store. He said we pay for using them and they need to be keep in good condition. Plus we don’t want our car or others cars to get dented. I think of Dad often. He was teaching us a boundary and good etiquette.
We park in lined parking lots. There are spaces for handcapped, for pregnant mothers, and sometimes for different size vehicles. Staying in our own lane is one of the first things we are taught in drivers education. Aren’t those all good boundaries? Yes of course.
Sleeping is a health boundary. Our bodies need proper rest. Playing is fun, but we learn early on that recess and too much of any one thing is not good.
In art classes we learn to color within lines. We paint distinct colors to define different areas on tennis courts or playgrounds. Charts are created for us to put answers in for clarity. Clarity is one of the biggest reasons for having boundaries.
Mentally we use all of these things to help us think clearly. What we do physically and in life replicates itself in how we think. Things are defined and categorized in our minds. We learn what is black and white and what is in between. We learn to discern truth from fiction and imagination from reality. We learn to be good to one another and to ourselves.
Boundaries keep us safe and happy. Keep good boundaries today and be aware of how much they help you think and be successful in life.